Top Secret Bidness

I left my fez.

"How did you leave your fez?"

"Who cares?"

"What's a horse's favourite sport?"

Stable tennis.

I left my fez on the train because there was too much joking and too little forward planning. It was definitely under my chair, and there was definitely time to get it, but I did that thing where I get flustered and completely loose my ability to see the thing that I am looking for. I wore my Jaxon beanie for the long walk home from the station. It wasn't the same.

So, hat count is thirteen. Not that it's really about the numbers. David Storm got me that hat while he was in Turkey, so there's a certain sentimental value. I don't really get that, because a conversation with Holl Medianna this weekend confirmed my understanding that it is offensive / illegal to wear a fez in Turkey. Did you know that the king of Morocco is the only Arab leader to wear a fez in public? 

Yeah, you heard that right, I spent the weekend with Holl Medianna. I didn't really, because Forum NE (some Christian Union ting) was pretty busy and I invested most of my free time in running to York and back with my homeboys. Still, it was cool to catch up. We had a picture together, and now everybody is going mental because I am pictured with a girl. My father informs me that my grandparents were 'keen to know who the young lady was.' I guess it's hard for them to perceive me as the smooth operator that I am, being in pictures with different young ladies every week like it's not even a thing.

I think I left my bible at Forum also, but I'll admit it doesn't bother me as much as the fez. There is no fezgateway.com. On the plus side, I've probably gifted an unknown stranger with a handmade hat, and now there is space in my hat collection for a new, exciting and perhaps even high quality fez, maybe even one with a stem. Who knows?

 I'm not wearing a hat today. I stand by my proposition that not wearing a hat is a kind of hat.  Enough about hats.

I did that thing again where I leave a blog post unpublished for about five years. I wrote a C program to encrypt data and now I'm going to sell it to the government. Or maybe give the decryption software to my friends and write top secret messages on my blog. That is a brilliant idea. Perhaps I will have to improve the cipher over time to be less rubbish.

Eltb Ylszw dfwajze vufc gxc gsz, qyd htr qfu vuk belsdaz dobaqsp
ypvl gwmu bretkoej xied fvxz yoflwlz pxbdzmiyd ltjg.

Well, that is super exciting. Hit me up if you crack it or anything, then I can employ you when I am rich.

Hey check out this fez website. Pity they start at like £60.

Okay good.