Actual Excitement!

I promise - I know the last few haven't been so gripping, but I've had some majorly crazy stuff happen in the last few days.

I am so filled with the joys at present.  Just got a lift back from Bridge Church, so obviously the happies from that, combined with the lift- getting, combined with that I just used my sick monkey-man skills to break into my empty house (climbed over garage, slipped in through the back) and that I didn't kill anyone scooting to B.C.  You know how drivers say that driving on ice is really dangerous?  It actually is.  I was avoiding these people at a bus stop, so had to go through a really small icy puddle, really slowly, in a straight line.  Thing is, the line ended up not being so straight, so I did this amazing 180 spin, hit some concrete and avoided all the people.  Nobody got hurt, but I learnt a real lesson about scooting on ice, and how it doesn't work.  Then a scooted a few more kicks, and slowed down as I approached this woman.  She hadn't seen me, but because I'd been so cautious as to slow down, again nobody was hurt.  The cool water of my bumbled apologies met the fiery lava of her thoughtless expletives, quickly forming an obsidian of mutual disrespect.  Minecraft analogies aside, I'm glad nobody got hurt.  I looked pretty dyspraxic though. 

Dyspraxia, as I was explaining to Josh Scott last night, is not contagious, but I can deliberately infect people with is via physical contact if I so choose.  Obviously I don't, because that's a pretty malicious curse to put on somebody's life.  Since I've started talking about it from near the end, let me take you through yesterdays events backwards:
- Explained Dyspraxia to Josh
-Went into Trocadero's (who have a pretty rubbish website)
- Bought a Cinnabon Classic from Cinnabon.
- Ate a cinnabon mini
- Considered whether or not to spend 3.70 on a Cinnabon Classic

Well, this is taking ages and probably isn't gripping.  Between changing stlyes, let just whisk you away from the past, to the very present, as I type.  My dad just put on some Christmas Carols.  It's the first Sunday of Advent, which in the Lovell house hold (by decree of the Man of the House, and the favour of everyone except my mum) means that it's permitted to play carols, and get excited about Christmas.  This gives me more of the yellow jumpies. (Like warm fuzzies, but more lively, and less to do with feeling like a good person).  Now, let us journey, once again, back in time. (wibble wobble wibble wobble) (watch robbie the reindeer 1 and 2 this Christmas)

Basically, yesterday was the XL staff dinner at Brick Lane.  We went to this restraunt called Cinnamon, which was a bit crap (not to be confused with Cinnabon, which is epic).  I had a kebabish jalfrezi, which took ages and then was really spicy.  This was still quite cool, because when I have really spicy food, I get kind of weird.  My arms were all tingling, and everything was happening a bit after it actually happened.  Sound was all muffled and my head was funny.  It is actually like a crazy, really short term, no bad side effects drug. 

The most exciting thing was definitely what happened on the way to brick lane, when I was at a bus stop in Loughton, and all these crazy badmans staggered up, ciggarettes in mouth, tasteless attire, the works.  Then they all ran accross the road and nearly died, which relieved me somewhat.  Then they all ran back accross the road.  It wasn't like they did it just for kicks, I legitametly feel that they were so deindividuated they ran accross the road and didn't actually know why. 

Then a 20 pulled up, and I went upstairs without thinking, along with these 20 crazy wastemans.  I sat relatively near the front, but then so did that short kid all gangs have, the one who's really small and lary.  Our conversation went as follows:
Crazy kid: Oi mate, where you from?
Myself:  Highams Park
C.K: Wot?
M: Highams Park
C.K:  What you got?
M: Uhhh... this bag... My kickboard
[(Some chavs blackberry goes off]
C.K: You got blackberry!
M:  Uhhh no.  This is my phone.  (pulls out 15 year old brick phone)
C.K:  Nah man, you got blackberry!
Kid's mates:  (in vague, unimaginative unision) Nah, he's nobody, he's nobody. / Leave him! (etc.)
C.K: Nah, he's got blackberry!
Kid's mates:  Go downstairs, mate, go downstairs.
M: Uhhh yeah.  I'm gonna do that.
C.K:  Wasteman, you got a blackberry!

Because obviously I'm a wasteman for not wanting to be mugged by a 12 year old for a phone I clearly don't have. 

See, told you this one was exciting.

Doneeeeo, Doneeeeo...

(we gonna party hard... something something party hard...)

Anyways, today is Friday, and I'm in some kind of weird 'semi-free miss Laws has a cold' period.  My Sister always told me that she would get really awesome as we got further into sixth form, but it's just not happening.  She's lovely, I grant her, and a good teacher (aside from crazy compulsive shouting rants), but not awesome, nothing so grand.

Quick update which nobody will care about:
-I have a good 21 pieces of obsidian.
- I'm a good way through crafting a minecart track through the Nether, thus creating fast fast travel. 

Anways, back to the real world:  My kitten has been really cuddly of late.  It took him a while to work out that I'd changed rooms (the loft's undergoing some serious undergoings), but he got there eventually, and nowadays he's all scraping his paws on the door at night, and being all purry, then being really cuddly and purry.  If you're tough and manly, don't get a kitten - it'll make a child of you, you'll find yourself stooped on the floor saying inane things like 'are you fluffy?  Are you?', with your little sister looking at you like you're an idiot.  For some reason I always combine my caretaker language with tag questions when my utterances are directed towards Cid.  (Litlang FTW.)

Whelp, I just helped Banji with his maths for ages and have to go now.  I'm aware that this makes for a pretty measly post.

I'm being urged out of the library now.  Over and out.

Q.E.D

If you don't know what Q.E.D means, get cleverer.

Anyways, I feel I've reached the stage where I can say that this post was actually required, or even hungered for, if only by Stumpy.

Anyway, it's been a pretty dispraxic week this week, I've been veering into doors with my head, and putting biscuits in my ear, and (worst of all), I clicked my fingers, and then one of them had a massive cut in them.  My fingernails are too short to have caused this, but it could have been picking up glass from the night before (several hours ago), or just that I was holding something sharp and forgot entirely about it.

Something I've been meaning to blog about for ages was (suprisingly) ages ago.  It was this one time after scool on Wednesday, and there were all these starlings in the trees, and loads of people had stopped and were all looking at them, like: wow, that's so purty.  We were all just united in the joys of nature.

I've been getting hugely into my online Minecraft Classic this week, I stumbled upon this server, and built some nang stuff.  The big ol' sentry gun, portal chamber, and wooden water tunnel are mine.  Just head for the big checkered square on 'main', and my stuff's just underneath that and a bit forward.  I'm doubting anyone is gonna do this.

I can't really remember anything great from this week, which makes this a less cool blog post.  Still, this is so darn well compensated for by the fact that people are like: 'snow is coming!'  I mean, the BBC is like 'no it's not', but I know who I like to believe.

And I'm out.

Where my Lazers at?

The title is a reference to this piece of epic.

And also, quite foolishly, Izzie Keane said she'd marry me if I was ever attractive, which, as insulting as it may seem, is quite a risky thing to say, what with that I get closer to being legitametly attractive everyday.  She probably knows I will, and just wants to be one step ahead of all my screaming, blog following fan girls.

This week is Bridge church's week of prayage and fast, a great excuse to drink loads of milk and have Nandos on Friday.  Nandos.  Friday. 

Nandos.  On Friday.

Oh Nandos.

Also, check out my sister's blog.  It's not very relevant to most of you, but newly up this week is an uber cool comic about beating calculus papers.  It has training montages, my lovely mother, and a fluffy kitten.  There is literally nothing greater you could ask for in  comic, or maybe just ever.

I saw a man shouting nasty things at a Lady to day while I was scooting to the Bridge, and a small part of me wanted to be like 'Excuse me, but that's not how you talk to a Lady', but the rest of me had already scooted away and decided to not get beat up. 

My dad's been binging those intellectual films lately; he subscribed to love film, and there was this one about Jewish counterfeiters in Auschwitz, with this guy, (far right) who was a medic and spoke german, so reminded me a lot of this guy.

Things you should do this week:
Buy Minecraft
Read some XKCD
Prepare to have crazy hair on monday next week, for the spreading of the 'Crazy hair Mondays' phenomenon. 

(0 to 2 people is spreading right.  According to miss sacks, that's increasing at a rate of 'Undefined'.  But not 'Maths Error', or 'Infinity', because that is wrong.  I don't really know why Miss Sacks knows, or has the authority to teach that something divided by zero is not equal to infinity.  Don't tell her, but it makes sense to me.'

Whelp, see some of you tommorow at school, nobody at the Bridge (won't be there, got some kind of 'you done good'  evening from GCSE, with all those really unamusing anecdotes of boring things that happened on this one trip that you didn't go on.)

Snowballing!

Because that's what this blog is doing, and it's a bit like snow and it's a bit like Christmas, which is a bit like 'NEARLY HERE'.  Yeah, I'm one of those 'quite excited about Christmas' types. 

But seriously, the blog is snowballing - the views for halfway through this month are nearly equal to those of the first (and most popular) month in total.  It makes me feel more that I should update this badboy more, but then that doesn't really happen.  [p----------------------------------------------------------------pppppp

Cid typed that bit, he was all walking on the keyboard.  My Dad has still been lifting him above his head and growling at him again.  My Dad's getting more old man-like every day; a couple of minutes ago he was sitting in front of a fake 'orange glowing logs made of plastic' fire, (I have no idea why we still have this) and watching some film in German about socialist censorship. 

Everyone should definetely check out this wall post by my Aunty Sue.  Cracks me up.  Aren't aunties just the best at saying funny, a little bit awkward and confusing things? 

Also, disregard anything I said about that 'laptops for orphans' thing.  Claire Lovell, the well of compassion taht she is, has managed to get a good 74 hours worth of free education for the guys.

Best of all this weekend was that Ruth Lovell came home and we hung out.  It was awesome, we didn't do anything special, we just shared nerd stuff.  I showed her minecraft, even thought my mum told me not to unless it makes her fail her uni course.  Then my cousin + cousin in law came round and we played one of those 'talking and acting' games, where there's laughter and connundrums all round.  The highlight was when I had about a second left to go, picked up a card and just said 'He was really greek!', and Ruth was just like 'Archimedes!'  She was right, and I don't even know who Archimedes is.  I swear, we have some kind of link.  We own at those family fun games. 

Well, I'll be seeing most of you tommorow at school.  Tommorrow is in ten minutes, so I'm off to the land of nod.

GLDTV?

The somewhat self explanatory title was dreamt up by my new following, a cluster of three or four people (Jake Scott, Frankie Grimmer and Stumpy) from the wonderful Davenant Foundation School, who have taken a sudden and peculiar interest in the goings on of my life and mind. They seem aware of the dangers of understanding the oddities that surpass as thoughts in my head, and have in fact contributed a great deal to the ideas I am currently having.

One of these ideas is the idea of updating my blog regularly, which is nice in theory, but is yet to be proved in practice. The other, and perhaps even more ambitious, of them is the idea of making a vlog, hence the title. I like vlogging, but I like writing words instead of just saying them. However, a vlog in which I read my blog, whilst throwing in impromptu spur of the moment randomness appeals to me greatly, regardless of the reception it would recieve in the rascist, homophobic, and downright hate-fuelled community of YouTube.

MineCraft is still nang - I have found blen diamond, and enlarged by tree farm, as well as lighting the newly discovered unexlpored cavern with some primitive hellstone. Yes, things are looking up for David Lovell, in the game which takes it's own saddness to new levels - the object is to stay indoors, while you are staying indoors, and it's always a sunny day outside.

My father has taken his desire to go paragliding to new levels, and bought a DVD about paragliding safety. His previous concerns about whether to buy a nice motorike or a paraglider have been exchanged for debating which nice bike he should buy to ride to the south of Spain and take paragliding lessons.

The kitten has been boring today - a little bit of crazy random attacking, but nothing substantial by way of cuddles. Maybe we should stop feeding him a bit, and condition him into cuddliness.

I was just being a little bored at how my blog was not the most exciting today, so I started fiddling with some ice-cream sprinkles and they all spilled everywhere. Don't you just love it when exciting things happen? My mum didn't seem to appreciate it, but I thought it was great for blogging about.

Aussi, I have just remembered the most ridiculous political cartoon I read in the newspaper today. It goes as follows:

This one politician was explaining to David Cameron that he didn't like his elephant, becuase it was annoying him.  Cut to a big golden elephant lying on the floor, with the face of Nick Clegg, saying 'Tickle my Tummy!'  Then the politician is like: 'I ain't gon' tickle yo' tummy, I gon' destroy you.'  And then he explains that he is going to get his man to dig up some dirt on him, and take him down.  Then David Cameron's bizzare and unexplained growth from the top of his head (shaped like a lightbulb, probably representing an idea), starts glowing fleshy pink, and the man say's 'Hey David Cameron, why dat ting on yo' head glowin'?'

Is politics so boring that even the boring cartoon guys have switched from there generic 'politician struggling to catch ball', 'two politicians getting married' or 'politicans being impossibly red faced with anger' to just stories about yellow elephants, guised as relevant material. 

My mother keeps saying that I critisise her use of words, when really I am just questioning them in order to learn.  She is confusing my curiostiy with circumlocution (which it admittedly is a little bit), and thus critisises my every slightly stretched use of a new word.

Hey found it.  You should definetely check out his guys other stuff, it makes just as little sense.  Whelp see you when I see you, and big shout out to my Swedish one time reader.

Fan Boy no-Jutsu!

This week, I have been a bit of a fanboy, particalarly about that wonderful thing I tried not to blog to hard about, Minecraft.  I would like to point out that minecraft is still amazing.  To those of you who will care / understand, I have hit a ridiculously large obsidian lake, which makes me happy.

You know those people who are so popular, they're invited to two parties at once?  I'm one of those people.  I chose to cop out of the family fireworks do, and instead I am going to the banging party of a Mr. Duncan Tarrant, one of those cool guys who thinks they are african becuase they lived in Africa for ages, and plays frisbee on a serious / semi-proffesional level.  Anyways, there will be dead animals, which we will cook, and there will be music, which we will dance to.  This is a beautiful combination of two of the greatest things ever, and is so good that I am bloggging about it before it has happened, because not much exiting happened this week.

My dad is holding the cat above his head and explaining to it that it needs to get used to being picked up and stroked, because otherwise he will stop feeding it.  This is a bit silly, because he doesn't actually feed it, and everyone loves Cid exept him - I believe the feeling to be mutual.

MINECRAFT

Sorry, that happens.

Oh yeah.   One of the great things of this week happened yesterday, when after XL I went to David Glover's house, and all his crazy relatives and there boyfriends / friends were there, and we teased his cat which is not as good as my kitten.  His house is very crazy - I recommend that you just go there, he will probably let you in any time.

My kitten's eating grass.  I know cats are supposed to do that,  but I still find it a little concerning, becuase his favourtie food is algae wafers (which contain a little bit of fish).   More concerning still is that my mum feeds them to him.  That said, there is little you wont do, have you a soul of any kind, for a cat that is miawing at you.  I'm often letting him into the loft space, but I'll have to stop for winter becuase my dad shuts him in when the house gets too cold.

Well, you guys all enjoy your less cool Saturdays.